When am I officially failing adulthood?

I feel like sometimes I am drowning in a sea of preconceptions. Of what my life should be like. Of where I should be going. Sometimes I feel I am sinking into failed choices. Failed goals. Dreams left unrequited.
I feel overwhelmed by my inability to keep up. My failings at not enough….

  • To write enough.
  • Read enough.
  • Bake enough.
  • Smile enough.
  • Run enough.
  • Self disciplined enough
  • Be smart enough.

Or my failing at being too much.

  • Too emotional
  • Too soft
  • too loud
  • too rude
  • curse too much
  • weight too much
  • indulge too much

 

when does if feel right to simply be enough.

When is being me enough? Β It feels near impossible when every moment has a part of it that makes me feel like I am failing adulthood.

A test I forgot to study for. A curriculum that I was not prepared for.

Adulthood.
Who signed me up for this?
Who thought this was a good idea?

A forced next step in the direction they tell me to go. That is what this feel like. Forceful organization of the masses to follow all the rules and be a certain way.

But when will they stop grading me? When will we stop comparing our marks?

And just get on with the story of being enough.

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