Dearest Younger Jess…

This weekend has been filled with reminiscing. I love to appreciate the past often, but it seems to be the trend for me over the last few days. It may have been the beautiful wedding reception we attended this weekend. It felt like a reunion of past friends.
My great friend Kelly said it best.
‘Its like a high school reunion, but I don’t want to avoid anyone. ‘
It was a great time and very needed to bring light to our drab January.

Also we received a scrap book of sorts from my beautiful mother in law. It documented my husband and his adolescent achievements.

All of these moments sparked me to write this letter. I wasn’t going to share it but I think many can relate to similar thoughts In your own life and maybe get us thinking.
Enjoy!

Dearest younger Jess,

Let me start off by saying you are beautiful. Really. I know you won’t believe me as you never believe anyone when they will say that to you, but you are. And I know I am right. I have seen you like no other has. I promise you.
You are not fat. Your hair is not to frizzy and your thighs are not to big.
You are beautiful and some day you will look back at pictures and truly wonder what you were thinking.
Believe them…even your mom, when they tell you that you are beautiful. They speak the truth.
Speaking of your mom, be nice to her. You are not and will never be too cool for your family. Your mom is amazing and soon enough you will not be able to survive without her. You will want to be like her, you will pray on a regular basis that you can be like her. Strong and beautiful.
You may now avoid all opportunity to get closer to the wonderful family that you have been blessed with but some day you will crave that closeness.
You will want to play with your sisters again. You will never be too old for it. You will want to go to movies with rick, not roll your eyes when he suggests it.
You will want them. Treat them nice. They are amazing and some day you will really see just how lucky you are.

Remember to spend time with the people you love. Before you know it they will not be here. Take it from me, you will regret the times you did not spend with them. Not the times you did. It happens so quickly, it feels like you blink and they are gone. We lost grandpa last year and on a regular basis I think about all they things I wanted to ask him or talk to him about.
All the books I wanted to share with him and stories I wanted to hear.
I know some day I will have a chance to hear them but it still doesn’t change the fact that I miss him everyday. Take the time, life is short and you will miss the people you love.

You are one of the lucky ones. The friends you have now will be there for you through it all. They will stick by your side and cheer you on. Treat them with respect and love. Do not give into the exciting drama that is adolescent friendships. The friends you are making now will be lifetime companions. The drama unfolding will not have any importance to you in the big picture. Love those friends with all your heart and treat them as you would want To be treated.

Now, it is very important that you read this next bit. You know that boy with the icy blue eyes and quiet voice? The one that makes your heart flutter. He loves you. Really. I promise. You may have no idea why and wonder if it is all a dream but I promise you he loves you.
Let him.
If you let him love you in his way, you are painting the picture of spectacular love.
You will watch him grow up. In the process, he will drive you nuts, push you over the edge and at times it will be hard.
Very hard.
But it will all be worth it. He holds the key to your fate. The life set out for the two if you is beautiful.
Believe me, I live it.
The beauty takes my breath away. That boy will grow up to become a man who will he share his life with you. You will create beautiful children. Children that hold a little of both of you in their being.
A little boy with eyes that make yours heart flutter in a different ways.
A little girl that makes you laugh in only ways you though that he could.
A little girl who loves so fiercely, with all of her being. Just like her daddy.
Your family will be everything you ever dreamed of. Just remember that he is beautiful the way he is. Perfect in his own skin. His love is unique, his style his own. Let him be him, try not to change him.

Your life ahead his going to be a great one. At times I will tell you that you will struggle to see the light but it will always be there. It will always be ok.
Just smile, the more you smile the happier you are. Fake it till you make it sweetheart. It always works, because you are strong and will always make it.
Your life ahead is gorgeous. Travel the road in your own step, maybe try to have some fun while you do it.

Much love,

Older and wiser Jess.

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Your beauty.

A nap time confessional.
A moment peace in my new creative space.

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praise,
Trust,
Hope,
Faith.

Trust the universe.
Hope for you
Faith in the beauty.

Share with us your beautiful song.
Sing deeply and longingly.

Invite us into your beautiful soul.
Eagerly waiting the invitation…
Into the amazing creation that is
You.

You. Only you.
Your story so profound. Your beauty so breathtaking.

Share that song with us.
Write those words

Share that beauty.

Because there is no one in the world quite like you.
An honour it is to be near such a life force.

The world is waiting. To hear…to feel… And to see you LIVE.

Each of our own stories are begging to be heard. They are begging to be set free. Because there is one else like you and no story quite like yours.

Shine the beauty on!

Much love,

Jessica

New joy brought with a 90’s playlist.

fire burning,
Incense burning.

Oldie hits of OUR past.
Creating background soundtracks to the scenes of our morning.

Kids screaming about spilt trail mix while green day with lyrics of days past. A life before them…
Remember?

Seemingly reminiscent.
Moments and mornings spent,
Of our dreams.

No plan,
No inherent destinations.
Calm times with no dependency.

The came the arrivals of extra limbs.
Needing.
And wanting.

Eat!
Sleep!
Toys!
Play!
Changes!
Help!
NOW!

But then ace of base came,
He saw the sign.
Without them, the joy of the sign is lost.

Our other baby’s spinning furiously.

A light shed on a moment of our past.

Then we ‘forgot about dre’
Soon remembered,

By her hip hop moves

Things may be different.
But a new view towards a fresh perspective.
Without them, so much forgotten.

Those quiet and different days of the past’.

Much love,

Jessica IMG_0261.JPG

Vibrant light: the beginning of 2015

We celebrated an amazing New Year’s Eve and day. Nothing extraordinary happened, but that is what made it awesome. Great friends, lots of food and drink and a lazy day. It was full of laughter, conversations and fun. Memories were made and friendships were strengthened. It was a wonderful 24 hours. I even made it out for a run with my powerful and amazing running team.
Over the evening hours last night, we talked about resolutions. My favourite topic. We all had a different approach. The most popular, get healthy was a big one. Some didn’t believe at all in resolutions. And some were as practical as changing the kitty litter more often.
I finally decided my resolution. My goal oriented resolution is to write a poem a day ( yes, that is right Miss Katelyn , you are stuck with my poetry). I received a beautiful journal for Christmas that I plan to write my ‘365 poems of 2015’ in.

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And my vague life oriented resolutions are:

To do what I love
To smile more
To find more fun in my days.

It is gonna be a good year!

Poem for Jan 1, 2015.

vibrant light

The days are open.
To be mine, only mine.

Mine to decide,
Mine to create.

Filling them with
Joy and laughter.

Finding the fun in all the
Little corners of my life.

Creating adventures, and smiles.
Composing memories, forevermore.

Being that vibrant energy.

Filling the every pore.

Seeing the colour and being the light.

My choices,
My life.

Much love,
Jessica