Arthur Alexander

My grandfather passed last Friday.  his time had come. He was ready, either way the grieving process is hard.

I wrote his eulogy, and thought I would share.

Arthur Alexander McPhail.

Arthur, Art, Dad, Grandpa, Brother, Uncle, Son.

In his later years, he was known as Mr. McPhail, Mr. Almonte, and Blue eyes. And lovingly referred to a ‘Grandpa with the house of ladies’ by his great grandchildren. That’s Art, a real Casanova of the old age homes.

A man of many names, a man of many roles. Art embraced each role with conviction. He was a great man. He lived his life with commitment and responsibility. He stuck around to get the job done. He know what was needed of him.  He was a rock. A solid point to lean on. His roots dug deep as he built a strong life for his growing family.  

He supported his best friend and wife of 61 years, Benita. She was the love of his life. He completed her. He was the calm to her passion. He was the wise words she was waiting to hear. Together they were a dynamic and indestructible. They committed their lives to one another. They held strong to their vows and were a couple that were proud of one another. They were partners through it all, for better for worse, through sickness and health. They were there to lean and to guide. They were together.

The home that they shared with their four beautiful children was a pillar in their lives. The special house. A house full of love. Weaved into the memories of his expansive family. That house is where Art called home for 57 years. That house is a part of him. No wall untouched by his hand, that house holds him close.

His commitment as a father was one he was proud of. A wonderful father. A kind father. He was respected and loved by his children. He put his heart and soul into that job. His children being his precious jewels. He loved being able to come home to them. He was proud of this three sons. His only daughter was she was cherished. They were loved with abundance. Their presence filling him with grace and love. Art loved his role as a father, as his children were blessed to have called him ‘Dad’.

His family gave him joy. His family filled his heart with love and bliss. He committed himself to being the best husband and father he could be. And he also allowed that love and commitment to flourish his relationships as a brother, and uncle a father-in law. He loved his family. All of them. He put whatever he could into keeping those relationship strong and beautiful.

His work life fulfilled him in another sense. True to form, he stuck with the same job, the same employer for 37 years. As a land surveyor, and eventually a crew chief for the ministry of transportation and communications, His job allowed him to support his family while nurturing a part of him that was needed. He was a brilliant man, full of knowledge. Getting out and working allowed him to feel fulfilled and challenged.

He brought that passion for knowledge home, His grandchildren have fond memories of him and his ability to answer any question you asked him. He seemed to always know the answer. If he didn’t know that answer, he found it out for you. He would read, he would use the encyclopedia, he would figure out how to get you your answer. He was concise. Eventually, he became just as intrigued as you. Sometimes those answers came weeks later, but he never forgot. He never let it go unanswered. He followed through.

Art was man of knowledge, of commitment and of few words. He did not waste his word. In a world were silence can seem to be too much for most of us. Art was a man silence. A silence that did not intimidate or create awkward moments. A peaceful silence. Sitting with him and not talking, just being was calming.  When conversations did arise, and he felt he had something to say. You stopped. You listened, because when Art had something to say, it was important. And you knew that. You wanted to hear what he had say. You wanted to hear his w

He was not a man that rushed. Why rush? Why move faster when everything he ever wanted was always around. His home, His love, his children with their children. He knew more than most. He knew it didn’t matter if we got the job done faster. He knew. He knew that it was about the journey, not the destination. So he took his time.  He took it all in, with time to spare. And he never rushed life. He was as smart man.

Arthur Alexander Mcphail was a beautiful soul.  A man of love, commitment, and peace. His impact here on earth was great, deep and rooted. His commitment to his responsibilities paid off. He created a family that has grown into 4 generations. He lives strongly in our memories. Playing a silent, loving role. Always there, always loving. Always surrounded by peace. His life will not be forgotten. It cannot be. He is there all the time. Reminding us to slow down, being the wise words we needed to hear, or simply being beside you. He formed a strong bond with the people in his life and we will never forget that.

God bless Arthur Alexander, Heaven is lucky to have you as an Angel.

Much love, 



Our love is a stream,
Slowly pushing and flowing.
A creek, with rocks that line the outside.
Trying to push back and collapse in.

Our love is a stream,
With dips and turns.
Rushing freely and with wild intention.
Sometimes predictable,
Sometimes intense.
But always moving.

Our love is a stream,
With a current beneath.
strong and pulling
delicate and soft.

Our love is a stream,
That can dry up.
On the hot and intense days,
It seems to be gone.
But it always there.
Waiting for the next downpour,
To fill it up and grow strong

Our love is a stream,
Pushing towards a larger body
A united goal
A joint love.
Finding a river to flow towards.
Finding them.

Our love is a stream that flows to their river.
Our love fills them up and keeps them alive.