I have two hands

I am going to be honest, we have had a tough go with money since the kids were born.
Choosing to stay home with my beauties is the best choice I have made but it can really tighten us financially.
Most days I can see clearly, knowing that it will all work out. Knowing that we will emerge unscathed by the stress of  money and debt.
I have faith that we are good people and as it may be tight now, someday I will look back and not see the ‘money’ struggle but I will see the happiness we cultivated in our home.
I won’t see the tiny rental home we have to have because it is all we can afford. I will see a home, full of fun and love. I will not remember the small living room and outdated decor, I will see my kids doing yoga on the floor with me and laughing together at ‘dinosaur’ pose.
I won’t see all the missed opportunities due to ‘not having money’ but will see all the awesome stuff we did together. All the adventurous trips to the park, swims in the pool, people we have visited and all the exciting walks we have taken.
On most days I see the good stuff, I know there is quite a bit of good stuff.
But there are still dark days.The days in which I get caught up in what we don’t have, what I think we need and the stress of it all overwhelms me.
When the dark days hit, I go a little crazy.
Worried, stressed and full of anxiety.
It can be too much to handle sometimes, and I lose my mind a little.
Unfortunately we are the starting stretch to the most expensive time of year, and these dark days of financial worry creep up onto my back and plant their dense weight on my shoulders once again.
Not only do we have Christmas, but there always seems to be more bills around this time of year. It can be a little much.
In the last few days I have felt the spiral. Downwards I seem to be going, heading towards the dark abyss of finacial worry….
But something has stopped this trip.
Something has made me rethink.
I started reading a awesome blog called “Momestry”  and each year the have a charity program they do called “Holiday hands”.
Woman all over post their stories of need and stress and as a community you can search and help out as you can.
It is amazing. And what it has shown me is that it is OK to ask for help and also it is showing me that I am  blessed. Truly blessed.
So many people are in true need of help and I am blessed to have so much good in my life. I may not have lots of money, but I have alot of substance in my life.
Thank you holiday hands for pulling me out of my dark abyss.
and please, check out the website if you can.The giving and support is incredible!

“For Attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
 For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
 For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
 For beautiful hair, let a child run their fingers through it once a day.
 For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
 People, more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed. Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms.
 As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself and the other for helping others.”
-Sam Levenson
See you later dark day of crazy! money can’t buy this much fun!
much love,

2 thoughts on “I have two hands

  1. Love this post Jess. I feel the same way most days. Money stress is very frustrating as it creeps into Christmas time. But you are very strong to be able to move past all of that and focus on what you are blessed with, with your gorgeous family!

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