I don’t like to play.

I am not the ‘playing’ mom.
I hate to admit it, but I hate conventionally playing with my kids.

I do however love craft time.
I love story time.
I love sing songs with them.
I love going for walks with them. My favorite is going on nature walks and talking about animals and plants. They always have awesome answers and observations.
I love sitting with my girls and talking about their day and their favorite things.

But I hate playing.

I don’t like having to kick a soccer ball around with them.
Or shoot balls into the net.
Or building Lego.
Or climb the play structure.
Or play tag.

We go outside and they want me to play, run and climb with them.

I am always filled with immense guilt trying to have fun but hating every minute of it.
I am just waiting for the right time to duck out and go back to drawing with chalk on the pavement with whatever kid wants to draw or going back to sitting comfortably and watching. 

It makes me feel like a terrible mom.

What mom hates playing with their kids?
Maybe I am just a generally lazy person.
I have never really been ‘sports/play’ inclined.

At least their Dad likes to play, run, build stuff with them and teach them about sports.
Maybe that is the balance they need.

I know it isn’t terrible that I would much rather do passive activity’s with them versus active play.
I know they need a balance of both in their lives. 
But I still suffer ‘mom guilt’  not being the one to provide every bit of stimulation for them.
There are lots of people in their lives who nurture their different aspects of development.

I just need to accept that I can’t be good at everything.
I am not a perfect mom.

The fastest way to break the cycle of perfectionism and become a fearless mother is to give up the idea of doing it perfectly – indeed to embrace uncertainty and imperfection.
-Arianna Huffington

Much love,

Jessica